It's 3 in the mornin and all I can think about is why couldn't I think of that? Shit definetly fucks w. me when I'm not on top like at the best of my game. I just be wantin to hear like yo thats dope man or good shit but when I don't.... i don't know. I feel like I've been puttin on a front for some people, like when I'm around certain people I act different like I have to act some type of way for them to like me instead of being myself and I think I've always been like that. I guess the only people who really know me are the people I fuck w. the most. Sometimes I think like people would really fuck w. me if they knew who I really was.. and then I think like I can't be myself around everybody cause I don't trust nobody. and i mean NOBODY. But now I'm really startin to feel like I have to stop thinkin like that it's not really about who or what people think you are because at the end of the day you're only left w. you and your family and for some their closest friends. Having the friends that I have has definetly helped me become a better person and set myself up to be in a better place but I'm still not exactly where I want to be. Still tryin to fit in and mimick what other people do instead of doin me.
I feel like I need to start havin the fuck whatchu think mentality but at the same time I don't want to change who I am. I respect the fact that I'm humble and won't only talk to someone because of their status or what they can offer me. I fuck w. people cause they're cool and down to earth. I look down on people who can't fuck w. somebody if they can't make them money or put them in the spotlight.
In a sense I feel like I made this blog not only to show people what I was thinkin but more so to get people to see that i was "cool". Watchin the views to see how many people came and postin things that other people might like instead of what I really think. This blog is supposed to be about me and for a while now it hasn't been. I need to make a change....... damn
Stay Cool..
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Stay Cool..
At first, I wanted this post to be something that everybody would like, something that would appeal to whoever read it. But after some much needed insight from my good friend Bianca, I realized that this blog and the posts that follow this, are not supposed to be what others like but are instead a tool to let others who read it get an understanding of who I really am. This blog is not something that..
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